Funny
A half truth is a whole lie.
I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.
I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.
I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face but with words.
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.
If I ever let my head down it will be just to admire my shoes.
Smile. You’re cute.
Life is a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get.
There is nothing better than a friend, unless it’s a friend with chocolate.
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