Sarcastic

I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.

I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

Life’s good, you should get one.

Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.

Find your patience before I lose mine.

Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.

Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on this planet.