Sarcastic

If you find me offensive, then I suggest you quit finding me.

I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.

I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.

Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.

Find your patience before I lose mine.

Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.

Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.

If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person on this planet.

Everyone has the right to be stupid but you are abusing the privilege.

People say that laughter is the best medicine…your face must be curing the world.